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(Talking)
May I have your attention please,
may I have your attention please,
Will the real slim shady please
stand up,
I repeat will the real slim shady
please stand up...we're gonna have
a problem here...
Ya'll act like you never seen a
white person before
jaws all on the floor
like pam and tommy just burst in
the door
and started whoopin her ass worse
than before
they first were divorced
throwing her over furniture (aaaaaah)
It's the return of the...
"awww..wait, no wait, you're
kidding,
he didn't just say what I think
he did,
did he?"
and Dr. Dre said...
nothing you idiots, Dr Dre's dead
he's locked in my bassment
feminist women love eminem
chicka chicka chicka slim shady,
"I'm sick of him, lookit him
walkin around, grabbin his you
know what
flippin' to you know who"
"yeah, but he's so cute though"
yeah, I probably got a couple of
screws up in my head loose
but no worse than what's goin on
in your parents bedroom (eheheheh)
sometimes, I wanna get on TV and
just let loose
but cant, but it's cool for Tom
Green to hump a dead moose
My bum is on your lips, My bum
is on your lips
and if I'm lucky, you might just
give it a little kiss
and that's the message that we
deliver to little kids
and expect them not to know what
a woman's clitoris is
of course they're gonna know what
intercourse is
by the time they hit 4th grade
they got the discovery channel,
dont they?
we ain't nothing but mammals
well, some of us cannibals
who cut other people open like
cantelopes
but if we can hump dead animals
and antelopes
then there's no reason that a man
and another man can't elope
but if you feel like I feel, I
got the antedote
women wave your pantehose, sing
the chorus and it goes
Chorus :
I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real
Shady
all you other Slim Shadys are just
imitating
so wont the real Slim Shady please
stand up, please stand up, please
stand up
cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm
the real Shady
all you other Slim Shadys are just
imitating
so wont the real Slim Shady please
stand up, please stand up, please
stand up
Will Smith don't got to cuss in
his raps to sell records
well I do, so f*** him and f***
you too
you think I give a damn about a
grammy
half of you critics can't even
stomach me, let alone stand me
"but slim, what if you win,
wouldn't it be weird"
why? so you guys can just lie to
get me here
so you can sit me here next to
britney spears
sh**,Christina Aguilera better
switch me chairs
so I can sit next to Carson Daly
and Fred Durst
and hear em argue over who she
gave head to first
little bitch, put me on blast on
MTV
"yeah, he's cute, but I think
he's married to Kim, hee hee"
I should download her audio on
MP3
and show the world how you gave
eminem VD (aaaaaah)
I'm sick of you little girl and
boy groups
all you do is annoy me
so I have been sent here to destroy
you
and there's a million of us just
like me
who cuss like me, who just don't
give a f*** like me
who dress like me, walk, talk and
act like me
and just might be the next best
thing, but not quite me
[Chorus]
I'm like a head trip to listen
to
cause I'm only givin you things
you joke about with your friends
inside you livin' room
the only difference is I got the
balls to say it
in front of ya'll and I aint gotta
be false or sugar coated at all
I just get on the mic and spit
it
and whether you like to admit it
(riiip)
I just sh** it better than 90%
you rappers out can
then you wonder how can
kids eat up these albums like valiums
it's funny,cause at the rate I'm
going when I'm thirty
I'll be the only person in the
nursing home flirting
pinchin nurses asses when I'm jackin
off with jergen's
and I'm jerkin' but this whole
bag of viagra isn't working
in every single person there's
a slim shady lurkin
he could be workin at burger king,
spittin on your onion rings
or in the parking lot, circling,
screamin I dont give a f***
with his windows down and his system
up
so will the real shady please stand
up
and put 1 of those fingers on each
hand up
and be proud to be outta your mind
and outta control
and 1 more time, loud as you can,
how does it go?
[Chorus] x2
(Talking)
haha guess it's a slim shady in
all of us... f*** it let's all
stand up |
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